It seems like everything I pick up to read lately is talking about moving or saying goodbye. I’m still in the middle of the Bible study, “No Other Gods”- yes I’m slowly taking my time- and this weeks lesson is called “Good Goodbyes”. Stacie also sent me a book to read called, “After the Boxes are Unpacked”. Both have been so good for me right now!
We are now in an “in between” place. Everything is packed (and sitting in a storage lot in California) and our house and furniture sold. Most of our time now is spent absorbing our last moments as residents of South Carolina and saying our goodbyes to all of our family and friends here. It has been a good time for me to prepare emotionally for the move. I want to be ready to embrace the new challenges ahead without feeling like I have to tie up “emotional” loose ends in my heart and in my mind. After reading and studying these things, I thought I’d share what has spoken to me this week.
“Do not call to mind the former things, or ponder things of the past. Behold, I will do something new. Now it will spring forth; will you not be aware of it? I will even make a roadway in the wilderness, rivers in the desert.” Isaiah 43:18-19
“Cherish the past, Cling to what IS”.
I love both of these thoughts. This frees me from the guilt of moving on. I have loved every moment of our time in Charleston, serving at Northwood, and the memories of family and friends, BUT… if I sit and dwell on what was here or compare the two, I will miss out on what God has for us there.
I feel like we are on the brink of something bigger than ourselves. I can’t wait to dive head first into it!
Lily got her first haircut 2 weeks ago. She was a little hesitant to sit in the chair by herself so she sat on Filipe’s lap and was distracted with a hairclip.
Before
After
Cailyn started walking on Friday- she’s only 9 months old!!! I didn’t capture the “big” one on camera, but at the end of the day, she walked 7 steps.
Here’s a little video I put together:
Eight years ago, I joined the volunteer team at Genesis and began leading small groups. I’ve been apart of many different types of groups: co-ed groups, women groups, young married groups, parenting groups. What can I say- I love small groups! Small groups changed my life- it’s where I met Filipe! Having encouragement and accountability built into my life has helped me grow and mature more spiritually than probably anything else in my relationship with God.
Small groups focused on girls are my favorite- girls in their late teens/early twenties. The ones trying to figure out life- school, career, marriage, etc. They encourage me, challenge me, and inspire me. For the past 2-3 years, my experience in leading small groups has changed dramatically. I began to see growth beyond what I ever expected. More girls and more lives changed. It’s been amazing!
Every August when groups start I share with the girls my heart and desire for them and the group- and every year it has been the same. My greatest desire is to see girls rise up above the drama and the “issues” they have with one another. For them to rid themselves of the jealousy, comparison, gossip, and “fakeness” that seems to infiltrate and destroy female relationships. I long to see girls who can love each other with the love of Christ, encourage each other, challenge each other, and be truly happy for one another. I will probably spend most of my life trying to do this and change the stereotype of female relationships. Maybe it isn’t possible, but maybe it is.
One of the saddest parts about leaving is that I’m leaving the girls I’ve been investing in, learning with and growing with. Every August a new school year begins which means small groups are restructured for the new year. This is the first year (in 8 years!) that I haven’t been involved in the coaching and plan for groups- and it’s kinda weird! This will likely be one the most emotionally difficult things for me during this process. I’ve spent so much time, energy, prayer, and thought trying to “figure” out what these girls need and how to help them see the incredible things God wants to do with their lives. I feel like I’m letting some down and abandoning others.
Over the past 2 years some amazing girls and amazing leaders have stepped up at Genesis. We built a great core team and had a lot of fun together. I loved just being around these girls- even though many of them were 8-9 years younger than me and I wasn’t the “coolest” one anymore! I am so excited for what the future holds for them. I know these girls will do even greater things than what we’ve already experienced. I couldn’t be more excited for them and proud of the growth I’ve seen in them already.
I will miss you all so very much! Thanks for allowing me into your life, for trusting me, and for your commitment to the small group. I love you all.
Right now we’re living at Filipe’s parents house and there’s a huge pile of boxes that didn’t fit on the trailer. So, now we have to go through and figure out what we really want to keep and what we can part with. Deciding what to do with things is the hardest part for me. Once I can make a decision about whether it’s going in the trash, goodwill, or wherever, I’m fine. It’s just coming to the decision that is difficult for me.
I’m learning a lot through it though:
As chaotic as all of it has been, I’m really enjoying the process. It will be good for us to have these last 3 weeks here being able to say goodbye and hang out with people rather than having to pack up until the day we leave. It will also prepare us for the move better because I’m sure that when September 3rd comes, we will be more than ready to go and get things settled in California.
Packing the trailer.
After it was packed Filipe had to take everything off and repack it because of the weight!
Lily liked playing inside the empty cabinets while I packed boxes.
