About two years ago I put fear in its place and finally allowed myself to dream. And I began to dream big. For me this meant that I would give myself the freedom to explore the world of writing, and really see if this was a direction I wanted to go.
Dreaming is one thing, doing is quite another.
At first I thought that my dream was to publish a book. That seemed like a reasonable dream for a writer. I thought of it as measurable success.
But then I thought about what would happen if I made it. If I actually did publish a book.
What next? Would I keep going? Would I stop?
Well, I don’t really know the answers because I haven’t published anything yet, but I do know that just getting a book published is not my dream anymore. (Nowadays someone with a little money in their pocket can publish a book .) So that isn’t it.
My dream is to inspire and influence others through the written word. That’s it. Maybe it is through this blog, maybe something else printed or published in the future. But for me as a writer, if I’m not inspiring others to greatness, if I’m not influencing others for Jesus, then it would be meaningless. It would be empty.
I get comments every now and then- whether in-person, email, or an actual blog comment, of how something I wrote influenced them. When I do, I know I’ve done well and I’ve accomplished my goal.
I still have a lot to learn, but it keeps me going, and for a moment I know what it feels like to be living my dream. It’s in those moments that I am.
Thanks for all of you who encourage me, I hope I can do the same for you.
Filipe and I returned from Seattle last night. We had so much fun! I’ve travelled to many big cities throughout the United States and I just love visiting a new one.
Why Seattle?
Why not Seattle?
Every city is unique, each one offers its own flare and style. Culture, and the way we live, has so much impact on us, often without us realizing. I enjoy seeing the way other people live. It reminds me that not everyone lives the way I do.
The morning of the 8th, we woke up early, dropped Lily off at school, and took the other two kids to Filipe’s parents house. The kids were excited for us to travel as much as we were. A weekend with their grandparents is a big party for them. They barely even looked back to wave good-bye as we drove to the airport. Needless to say, we weren’t all too worried about them.
We arrived in Seattle around noon to partly cloudy, but sunny skies. Not taking the sun for granted we embraced the warmer weather and did as much as we could outdoors.
The first stop- Pike Place Market.
We quickly found a great little lunch spot called Lowell’s.
Great food & a great view on the water w/ snow-capped mountains filling in the background.
Afterward we strolled through the market. We watched cheese curd being made, glanced in at the olive oil tasting rooms, & saw fresh produce galore.
There were tables and tables of seafood. There was no shortage of fish here!
Our last stop on our way out was, of course, the original Starbucks.
I couldn’t leave without getting a latte from the place it started, and the place that gives me a reliable office space whenever I need.
We left to check-in to our hotel and get a little nap in. This was the view from our window as the sun began to set.
Beautiful!
That evening we had dinner reservations at the top of the Space Needle.
The food was incredible (Filipe is still talking about the ribs he had).
The night was perfect!
I told Filipe it was one of the best birthdays I could remember.
We spent the rest of the weekend relaxing, and enjoying a few of the other sights of Seattle. It rained most of Friday & Saturday, but we didn’t think a trip to Seattle could be planned around the rain. We visited Snoqualmie Falls, spent the afternoon shopping in Bellevue, and indeed, visited three local churches.
Great trip, great memories.
How was your weekend?!
Filipe and I are here in Seattle enjoying this beautiful city. I will share more about it and post pictures next week. For now, here are just some random moments over the past couple of weeks.
Lily is maturing every day. She is reading far beyond what I thought she would be capable of by now and she loves to write (cards, notes, “books”, etc). This mama couldn’t be more proud. The best part is that she is very self-motivated right now. I do very little pushing, and try and do a whole lot of encouraging.
But of course, there is always the need for discipline and correction. When it’s necessary, I try and think big picture and get to the root of the problem, not just correct the bad behavior. Case in point (disclaimer, not sure if this was at all a good idea, just telling ya what happened).
We are working on her ability to stay focused and not get distracted. Often I’ll ask her to do something but as she goes off to do it, something else will inevitably catch her attention and she’s off doing else. This happened last week. I asked her to do something minutes later went upstairs to find her in my bathroom with a bottle of hairspray in hand “fixing” one of her doll’s hair. It wasn’t a big deal what she was doing, the big deal was she totally disregarded my instructions.
I had to think of some kind of discipline that would focus her attention for longer that a few short minutes. So I told her before she could do anything else she had to write me an apology letter without my help. She disappeared into my office and came back about 30 minutes later with this:
“Mommy I am sorry for disobeying you and for using hairspray without asking you.
Please forgive me.”
Efraim is a big talker now. His language is developing quickly, and his personality comes more alive each day. His favorite phrases are “hold me mommy”, “ajuda mama” (portuguese for “help”), and “abri, abri” (portuguese for “open”). My mom sent the kids little photo albums from our trip to Charleston over Christmas. He loves looking at them and staring at the faces.
I finally renewed our membership to the Children’s Discovery Museum in San Jose. I took Cailyn & Efraim last week when it was raining and we had a blast!
Efraim is very particular. Everything has to be “right”. Here here is trying on the Fireman jacket making sure all the buckles are closed.
Ta-Da!
But, being the boy he is, “driving” the fire truck was his favorite.
(This pic doesn’t quite capture his excitement, he was more concerned about Cailyn NOT taking his seat.)
Cailyn is my little big helper. She makes things a little easier for me during the mornings when it’s just me, her, and Efraim. If you ever wondered, I think the age difference between the two of them is perfect (26 mo.). Cailyn wants to be a cook when she grows up.
Here she is at the children’s museum:
with her cookie factory.
She helped Filipe bake me a birthday cake,
and she knows the best part.
Wednesday night we celebrated my birthday with Santos family & the Wood family. That cake was one of the best I’ve ever had. The name? “Deep Chocolate Raspberry Cake” It was a rich chocolate cake w/ a ganache like layer outside. Unbelievable!
I hope your family had a great week!
I’m a year older. Hopefully a little wiser too.
I’m celebrating my 32nd birthday today with Filipe.
We’re flying to Seattle, WA for the weekend.
Just us, no kids. Why? Just because.
It’s one of the cities on my “bucket list”, and a place neither of us have ever visited before. I’m so excited to explore a new city and just hang out for no other reason than, “because we can”. I’m sure we’ll visit a church or two (maybe three) and find a pastor we can learn from before we leave- that’s what we pastor-types do ya know (and we actually like it!).
I’m expecting relaxation and rain. I don’t think I’ll be disappointed on either.
For today, go do something fun with someone you love. Why?
Just because you can!
Query me. Query my.
To be honest, they’ve scared me.
Back in 2004 a writer interviewed me for her book about twenty-something married couples. I graciously answered her questions via email, and at the end casually asked her a couple of questions about the writing industry. She responded with some great tips on how to get started. One of the things she told me to do was to send a “query”.
Now before I go any further, you must understand that at this point in my life, the idea of writing was as serious to me as the idea of hosting an over-the-top dinner party. It sounded fun and classy, but I didn’t really know where this “random idea” would lead. Hosting a dinner party could lead one person to become an professional chef or event planner while a random question about the writing world may lead one to pursue publishing.
I wish I could go back and email that author now because I think the world of her (not that I didn’t then, I just didn’t know then what I know now). If I ever get a chance to connect with her again I at least have a great convo starter. “Hi! You once interviewed me for one of your books, will you endorse mine?!” Okay, okay, I’ll try to be more profesional than that, but we both know that’s really what I would be thinking.
So where was I again? Oh, back to queries.
To be honest when I first saw the word query, I thought, “no way!”. It was intimidating, scary, and it seemed like a great way to set yourself up for rejection. But a lot has changed over the last eight years.
I’ve grown to really love writing, not just the idea of it, and have something in my heart that I’m passionate to write about.
I sent out my first query last week. Something may come of it, something may not. But getting over the fear of it is freeing. Going through the process has been a huge growth step for me. Especially since I’ve worked over a year to get to this point.
Hopefully it won’t be my last.
Here’s to taking a risk. Doing something scary. Something that very well may be rejected.
What could be worse?
Doing nothing.
Throughout the last month I’ve mentioned:
The strangest thing about all three of these things are the way they parallel each other. Last week I kept finding myself relating something I read in Bonhoeffer to something I was studying in James and then seeing the same thing portrayed in Downton Abbey. On our date night a couple Fridays ago, I shared with Filipe all the things I was learning about and kept getting mixed up with where I had read/studied/watched it.
Coincidence? Maybe not.
Interesting? I think so.
Whenever we study Scripture, God sheds light on the things around us. When we’re paying attention and take notice, He will speak to us through many avenues and teach us through them. Engage with the Scriptures, study them, and experience God’s Word working in your life. You don’t have to read Bonhoeffer
Just make sure you’re paying attention.
I haven’t always been a fan of American Idol. When the show first aired it took me a couple of years to even be aware of its existence. The first year I watched was the year Carrie Underwood won- I remember watching her audition, and something about her instantly had me hooked. I rooted for her from that day on.
There’s two reasons I continue to watch:
1. Dreams Come True
I love watching a guy/girl come in from the shadows and climb their way to the top. There’s no guarantee for success- watching them cut Jim Carrey’s daughter a few weeks ago proved talent must supersede who you know. There’s so many things that stand in the way of our dreams, and seeing these guys and girls hurdle them is inspiring.
2. Steven Tyler
He’s weird, he’s quirky, and he’s hilarious, and that’s why I love him. Whenever something “colorful” comes out of his mouth, I say a prayer that he’ll come to Jesus and be able to share his crazy personality with us throughout all of eternity.
The first CD I ever bought with my own money was Aerosmith’s Big Ones. Crazy, Love in an Elevator, and Cryin’ anybody? In high school I loved the rock bands of the 80′s (U2, Bon Jovi, Van Halen, R.E.M., Def Leppard, I loved ‘em all). I think using the phrase “first CD” and “80′s band” in the same sentence qualifies me being officially old.
What is something trivial you find yourself captivated by? Am I the only 80′s band fan? (If so, I’m completely okay with that!)
Last Wednesday I wrote about how Saturdays are a big writing day for me. Well, in addition to Saturdays, the other way I accomplish my writing goals is by waking up before the sun comes up.
First you must know, I am not a morning person. Never have been. I used to relish in the fact that late nights were my most productive hours of the day. And while I still want to love late nights, my body doesn’t. At least not while I have three kids 5 and under that I’m responsible for the majority of the day. Most days by about nine o’clock my mind, body, and soul are done.
As much as I fought it, morning won fare and square.
I’m believing late nights will return one day, but that day is nowhere in the near future. So, I finally realized that if I want to pursue my dream while my kids are still young, then this is one solution that can realistically happen on a daily basis. I don’t have to worry about babysitters, school, etc. No one can meet with me or schedule things during that time. I have complete control over my schedule in these hours of the day.
My alarm goes off at 5:25.
Most days I get up.
Every day is hard.
I pile on some warm clothes in the dark, and say a thank you to God for getting me out of bed. I trudge downstairs for a mug and back up again to my office where I press “brew” on my Keurig . I spend the first 30-45 minutes with God- praying, reading Scripture, journaling, or whatever I feel is necessary to connect with God that morning.
Afterward I will usually work on a blog post, my writing schedule, and brainstorm ideas.
It’s not a big block of time considering I have to wake up my oldest at 7, and it’s go-go-go from then on. But, it’s some time, and it’s enough to keep me ahead of things. When I do get the large blocks of time, I can give my mind the freedom to just write.
Mornings are tough, but sacrificing my mornings is worth it.
For me anyway.
Are you a morning person? (If so I envy you!)
I mentioned a couple weeks ago that I started Beth Moore’s study of James with my Life Group and that I am taking on the level 5 challenge of memorizing the entire book too. I haven’t memorized much more than a verse of Scripture since elementary school, so this is a BIG deal for me.
I’ve always like the idea of memorizing Scripture, and I’ll occasionally carry around 3×5 notecards of verses or tape them to mirrors, dashboards, etc to feel like I am, but really I’m not. I don’t focus on really memorizing- and retaining the info, I just mainly carry it for reference. (Which isn’t bad, just not the same as memorizing!)
But as I’m going through this process, I’m learning there’s a huge difference between having Scripture on a card in front of you and having it in your mind and in your heart.
Currently, I’m a few verses short of having chapter 1 down. Here’s what I’ve learned through the experience so far:
- I really CAN do it.
- I really can do it and even ENJOY it. It’s the least bit burdensome.
- My thought life is much more honoring to God.
- As I focus on Scripture throughout the day, it changes how I look at my situations- my joys & my sorrows.
- The more I memorize, the more I want to memorize. It’s a snowball effect- the more TRUTH you grab a hold of, the more of it you want.
Maybe you’re an easy memorizer, or maybe you’ve never really been a fan. But from someone who was NOT a fan to a recent convert I must say it is incredible.
Go, try it! What have you got to lose?
This is the first year the school calendar affects our family. Up until now, I’ve been the one to set the pace for our family schedule. I’ve been in control of pretty much every activity from eating and sleeping to playtime and fun time. I work hard to keep a schedule so that the kids maintain a sense of consistency and security within our family.
While there have been plenty of days over the course of five years that I would disregard the schedule and go with the flow, it didn’t last long, and I didn’t always feel good about doing it. I would quickly snap back to routine and keep things flowing smoothly once again.
Now I have someone else giving input to our schedule.
Apparently in California schools (at least Nor Cal) they have “winter break” instead of “spring break”. This week, Lily’s has had the whole week off. And you know what?!
It’s been fabulous.
Having a week off has given me the freedom to take the week off, embrace it, and more importantly, enjoy it. Over the last couple of weeks, I felt those early symptoms of fatigue and weariness, so this break came just when we needed it.
This week:
- No alarm went off.
- We played when we wanted.
- We all enjoyed naps & rest time.
- With the exception of Tues night (our Life Groups) no cleaning or real work took place in our house (Filipe did work Tues-Thur.).
- I spent my free time watching the entire 1st season of Downton Abbey instead of my usual reading/writing.
- We enjoyed the warm weather outside (this “winter” break felt more like “spring” here in the Bay this week).
- We made a Rice Krispies Igloo (it was after all “winter” break).
- And most of all, we enjoyed being together.
It’s been so good for me, for the kids, and for our family as a whole. I can enjoy this week off and feel completely at peace knowing it’s not every day, it’s not normal, and life as we know it will return to our “normal” soon enough.
Here’s just a few pics:
Started the week off w/ a little French press to go with our French Toast.
Then headed to Bounce-a-Rama for a little fun in the jump castles.
The girls spent every morning playing together.
They even had a worship service with their barbies & dolls.
Some days we enjoyed lunch outside.
And in the afternoons played “mommy & baby”.
Our attempt at a Rice Krispie Igloo- after the decorating the front collapsed a little.
At least it was fun to make & fun to eat!
We ended the week today with a big family day at the park. You don’t need much to have fun as a family. A playground & sand, a field & a ball, it’s pretty easy to entertain your 5, 4, & 2 year old.
And when your girls come lay down on the blanket with you, you’re sure- it’s been a good week!
Rested & Relaxed= A Successful Break
