I’m not sure what came over me today, but when I finally sat down to write the post on fairness today- the one that’s been swirlin’ around in my head the past two weeks, this is what came out. I think you call it a poem, but having never in my life written one before, I’m a little unsure. If you like it, don’t get used to it, if you don’t, well, I’m sure I’ll be back to my normal self soon enough. For what it’s worth, hope you enjoy!
Life’s not fair.
We may say it, or just think it,
but most of us believe it.
Even if fair is under our control
or it’s not.
We may see it in the family we were born into,
or where we live.
We may feel it in our perception of others,
and compare ourselves to them.
We may experience it at work or on the team,
by never getting the promotion or the position we so dream.
What do we do?
How do we respond?
When life isn’t fair.
Do we run in fear?
Hide our head in shame?
Do we fight for our place?
Or stand up for our rights?
God knows your place,
He created you for a purpose.
He knows how you feel,
and even relates with your pain.
We can’t run from life,
change our situation,
or rewind the past.
We can only press forward,
and look at last.
On the face of Him.
The One who understands.
Don’t you think He knows
just where we’ve been?
He’s been there.
Remember, life wasn’t fair to Him.
In the deepest of pain.
The deepest of suffering.
The King came in obscurity,
came to abolish your sin.
Life may not be fair.
But, then again.
It has been forgiven.
In Christ we are free
to live life once again.
We are all known for something.
It may be…
what we’re for.
what we’re against.
our cynicism.
our sarcasm.
that thing we did wrong.
that thing we did right.
how we judge.
how we’ve been judged.
God tells those of us who are Christ followers, “Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples”. (Jn 13:35 NLT)
God didn’t just throw out the “L” word and hope we would figure it out. He gave us an entire chapter of the Bible dedicated to what the word love means.
I Corinthians 13
There’s a great practice my husband taught me years ago. Whenever I want to see how I’m doing in the area of love is take I Cor. 13:4-7 and replace love with my name. When I do, would it be a true statement or far from it? It’s easy to say we love, but it’s a little more difficult to say we are patient, or say we don’t boast.
Try it out for yourself. In the blank insert your name.
___________ is patient.
___________ is kind.
___________ does not envy.
___________ does not boast.
___________ is not proud.
___________ is not rude.
___________ is not self-seeking.
___________ is not easily angered.
___________ keeps no record of wrongs.
___________ does not delight in evil.
___________ rejoices with the truth.
___________ always protects,
___________ always trusts,
___________ always hopes,
___________ always perseveres.
How would you rate yourself?
What are you known for?
I received an email this week from a new mom struggling to find time with God. I’m pretty sure she and I aren’t the only ones (since I completely understood where she was coming from), so I thought I’d post about this topic here to help any other mom’s out there looking for help in this area too. (This response has been edited and expanded.)
Bad news?- The way your relationship with God used to be may never be the same again.
Good news?- You can still grow in your relationship with God!
Expectations are what makes this area so difficult. Don’t expect yourself to have the capacity to do the same things you used to do right away. Whatever “time with God” looked like for you before will have to change a little (or a lot!) depending on what you used to do.
It doesn’t mean you can’t have time alone with Him, it just has to be more flexible in the early stages (especially in the early weeks when the baby is eating every 2-3 hours and you’re not sure if it’s 2am or 2pm!). You may not have much alone time for a while, and when you do there will be 50,000 things that you will need/want to do when you have it.
At South Bay Church this past Sunday, Pastor David spoke about spiritual disciplines. His definition for spiritual disciplines: “activities to help us become more like Christ”.
If the activities aren’t working then they stop serving their purpose. The purpose of reading the Bible isn’t to stuff our minds with more knowledge or see how many chapters we can read a day, it is to transform our lives. If it’s not, then re-think what you are doing. Instead of reading (and falling asleep), maybe listening to Scripture or worship music is better for you right now. You may just spend time meditating on a single verse allowing your heart and mind to fully grasp it’s meaning for you today. It may seem small, but that small verse has the power to transform how you mother that sweet baby.
I believe that sometimes as a mom, your “spiritual activity” is nursing and/or taking care of your baby. I don’t think it’s less spiritual just because it doesn’t involve a Bible and journal. To have a quiet time alone sounds like heaven to me, but if I’m neglecting my kids so I can have time with God, does that bring honor to Jesus? Of course not. I’m sure in those moments, He’s up there shouting, “go take care of your kids, I can wait!”.
Making time to love and care for your baby is what God’s called us to do as a mom. We are called to be present in our kid’s lives. To love, nurture, and train them. The more we invest, the more rewarded and blessed we will be. Those rewards just may even come with more quality of the time we do have. You may get a full 15 minutes of good, solid time as opposed to an hour you used to have (but may have mentally not been there the whole time.)
I find that whenever I work out my schedule to have more time with God, the schedule changes and I’m back at where I started. I’ve finally learned not to beat myself up for it, but to focus more on the relational aspect.
- What are my thoughts focused on?
- Am I listening to Him?
- Am I growing closer to Him?
- Do I go to Him first or am I trying to do things on my own?
- Am I obeying Him?
Being able to answer yes to those types of questions gives me confidence in how I’m doing or challenges me in ways I can improve. (And there will always be room for improvement.)
The most important thing is that you care about putting God first and desire to have a growing relationship with Him. When you’ve done that, He will speak to you in ways you can hear- He probably already is more than you realize. Just make a point to notice. Even if it’s while you’re changing a diaper or cleaning up spilled milk.
