What’s with the silence? Well, I’ve been in the middle of a dilemma lately. Do I really want to blog or not? Really the simple answer is yes. Of course I do, but if so, I have to have purpose to what I’m blogging about. I can’t stand doing anything if I don’t feel like there is a reason for it. “Just for fun” is usually not me because the “fun” never lasts long.
Last week I took a day off and went to the beach. Just me and Jesus- it was very nice! As I was journaling I wrote down words that describes God: Truth, Life, Faithful, Majestic, Merciful, Passionate, Redeemer, Father, etc., etc. Afterward, I thought about who I am, what I do, and where I should focus my time. I wrote wife, mom, leader, writer. The wife and mom part is a non negotiable, and leader part isn’t as hard for me as much anymore because I have clearly seen God use me in leading others closer to Him. Grasping the fact that God could use me to influence others took quite a while! The writer part is where I struggle. I don’t necessarily see myself as a writer, but I felt like God said, “if you never do it, you never will”.
So, I’ve decided to keep at it. Writing is something I deeply desire to do and can’t seem to get away from it. I’ve tried, really. Now I am rearranging my schedule to allow myself time to plan ahead and write something of substance. I read a great book on writing by Jerry Jenkins a while back called “Writing for the Soul”, and I realized that writing doesn’t just happen. Sometimes it seems like it should- especially when we feel inspired, but it has to be taken seriously just as any other job or profession. I often have things swirling around in my head at all times, but because I haven’t made blogging a priority for me, I usually let it slide before anything else. I realize I don’t have the time to make it a 40 hr/wk job, but I can do a lot more than I am if I give myself the freedom.
Here we go. Hope you stick along for the ride with me!