I was in junior high when I developed affections for soap opera’s. My friends and I spent many summer days watching Days of Our Lives and General Hospital. Over the years what was a fun escape from the perils of our real life drama became a full blown obsession with a fictional one.
When I moved away for college, I invested in a VCR. Now with the ability to record the shows I loved, it was an easier addiction to manage. My life no longer revolved around airtime; I could stay up to speed with Luke and Laura whenever my schedule allowed. And sometimes I’d even wait until Saturday to catch up on a whole week’s worth of shows. Netflix hadn’t yet entered our world, but I was already living that binge-watching life.
Then one day, alone in my dorm room, I had a wake up call. There have been a handful of times when the Holy Spirit spoke so clearly to me I knew it was Him right away. I did not hear an audible voice, but I sensed one near.
I heard Him say, “These lives you watch on screen pale in comparison to the life I want to give you. How about you stop watching their fake life, and let me give you a better life.”
The reason I know that was the Holy Spirit talking is because I could not have come up with that kind of revelation on my own- I was too emotionally invested.
But it clicked. I finally admitted I had an addiction problem, and that very day I stopped watching soap operas. They’ve been out of my life ever since.
We love to be entertained, don’t we? We have low-cost streaming services, and a vast array of options to keep our attention at our disposal. We can watch basketball games on our phone during a parent meeting; our kids can watch Mickey Mouse in the shopping carts. So how do we navigate all the options? Where do we draw the boundaries? Especially with our kids?
I’ve noticed most of us draw boundaries around ratings and time limits. And that’s probably a good, healthy start. (Even the pediatricians make us check this box during well-check up appts.). But are they enough?
Entertainment allows us to escape our own reality, and enter someone else’s world. For an hour or two (or six, thanks to Netflix) we have a chance to see what someone else’s world might be like- even fictional ones (hello Stars Hollow!). And that in itself is not a bad thing, that’s a wonderful thing. It gives us new perspectives, inspires us, and teaches us new things about the world and the people in it.
But we can cross the line. Obsessions will entangle us eventually. Whether it’s a Netflix binge-fest, non-stop cable news, or reality TV we can get so hooked to someone else’s world on-screen, we begin living our life differently. And that’s when it becomes a problem. When our real life world becomes controlled by our on-screen worlds.
This isn’t an easy area to give clear, black and white boundaries. This is one of those things only you know is really a problem. I want to help my kids experience more fun in their actual life than any they watch on screen. Playing basketball should be more fun than watching it. So I offer no real list, just a challenge to check your heart and see how it’s been affected by the things you watch. Does it inspire you, motivate you? Does it make you impatient, discontent? Only you really know (and maybe your spouse and kids.)
In our home, I try to keep a pulse on how the things we watch affects us- our heart, our behavior, our beliefs. And if I ever wonder if something is an addiction, I’ll cut it out for a while, just to make sure it’s not.
Television and movies are fun when they are in their proper place. They brings families together, ignites creativity, and allows our imagination to wander a little bit more. Just remember to live your real life more than obsess about the fictional ones. Real life and real relationships will always be better than watching someone’s fake life on-screen.