My kids head back to school today, and let’s just say, we’re all excited about it. I’m throwing a little party over here complete with an extra almond latte and silence. Can you tell I’ve spent ten weeks with lots of kids and noise? We had a wonderful summer filled with lots of memories, but we’re all ready to get our routine back. As I send my kids off today, I want them to see our relationship with the school as a partnership.
As a parent, I view my kid’s education as my responsibility. I’m also very aware I’m not the best one to educate my kids. I need all the help I can get. Teachers with degrees in math and science, engineering and english are much more skilled than I am, and are trained to teach my kids in a way I cannot. Coaches with experience are much better equipped to help my kids excel in sports I know nothing about. So I don’t pretend I can.
We’ve chosen to partner with the public school district in our city to educate our kids because that’s what works best for our family. But, at the end of the day, it’s my responsibility to lead and train my kids, not the schools.
I want my kids to see their teachers and I as a team-partnered together to help them succeed, not at odds. I want my kids to feel confident that I trust the school administration and teachers to assist me in their education- not see my doubts or uncertainties.
- Do we all share the same values? No.
- Do we use the same methods? Not at all.
- Do we all have the same expectations of what they can achieve? Not always.
- Do I support them? One hundred percent. (And if I ever can’t, then I’d make a change.)
I really don’t know what I’d do without having the partnership of the school to help me educate my kids. I”m regularly reminded of how hard a job it is. A partnership with our kid’s teachers starts at home and how I speak about them. So, I’m intentional to:
Speak positively about their teacher, with the teacher, and assume the best about them and their intentions. Between all five of our kids, we’ve navigated many difficult situations, but all resulted in a better relationship with the teacher. Whenever there’s been an area of miscommunication or confusion, we’ve gone directly to the teacher under the assumption we misunderstood or were misinformed (or our kid). I know full well I cannot do a better job, so I don’t pretend like I can. Being positive and expecting the best is a great approach to uncomfortable or challenging situations.
Honor expectations no matter how different or unfair it may seem. Every teacher has different rules and ways of doing things. I don’t expect every teacher to bend to accommodate my kid, I do expect and teach my kids to be flexible. After all, flexibility is a part of maturity. Not to mention, have you been in a first grade classroom or a middle school cafeteria? The fact that they even put themselves there five days a week makes them a hero in my book.
As my kids come home today and every day this week, they will likely tell me about all the good things and the not-so-great things about their upcoming year. How I respond to them and all that isn’t easy or fair will determine how they approach those things this year.
For my kids to grow and develop, they’ll face new challenges that require new skills- usually it takes uncomfortable and hard situations for it to really stick. When a friend gets switched to a different class, they have a chance to learn how to make new friends. When a teacher is strict, my kid can learn new responsibilities. When they receive a consequence for forgetting to turn in homework, they’ll learn to remember better next time.
Whatever this new year brings, I’m trusting we will approach it together and get to the other side a little bit stronger and braver than when we started today. Cheers to a great year kids!